Sunday, July 31, 2016

Paranatural: Why it is awesome and you should definitely read it

 *Waves Hello to the people and kittens, but not the ominous clouds looming overhead, they don't get a friendly wave*

It's summer vacation now, and that means that basically I have a lot of time to attempt to be productive, but mostly end up flopping around and doing decidedly unproductive things,

One of the things I did was bingeread the entire Paranatural (which is fabulous, more on that below) which is the event that inspired this post.

I was actually going to make this post my top three webcomics (I read them a lot, they are such fun!) but I ended up raving so long about Paranatural I decided to make the whole post about it because it DESERVES A WHOLE FULL POST!

Now I’m sure you must be thinking
Crystal, I am so lost! What in the skies is a webcomic?!
Well well well precious reader, get your learning caps on because i'm about to tell you.

Webcomics are basically comics (Bet you couldn't guess!) that instead of a book are uploaded online. The artist tells the story in a series of updates that continue until the comic is done.

Make sense?
Basically a webcomic is an online comic.
Capicse? Good.


It is appropriate for humans of all ages which is awesome because you can make all the little children in your life read it and not have to hide it from their little prying eyes.

Note: I will not put pictures from the actual comic in this post in respect for the artist/author's intellectual property.

"Paranatural is a comedy/action comic about a group of superpowered middle schoolers fighting evil spirits and investigating paranormal activity in their hometown."    Source

This is actually my favorite webcomic, for many many (many) reasons. As I already mentioned before I bingeread all of this in a few days and now I am stuck waiting for updates for new pages which is NOT OKAY! What do you mean the artist has other things to do with his life?! Surely his sole purpose is to provide me with more pages (leave me in my delusions)

Reasons it is fabulous

-It is HILARIOUS! I read it and literally laugh out loud (not the lame kind of lol that people text you when you know they probably have the facial expression of a stone blobfish!). And then people stare at me and demand to know what is so funny but the precious is mine! All mine!

So sad, so sad.

-My sisters (small gremlins that they are) rave about it constantly and harass me to check updates for them. They made me read it, now I love it, chase them, it is their faults!

- The alt texts Zack Morrison writes for each page are priceless, along with the comments he sometimes writes along the bottom. They are half of the experience. DO NOT SKIP THEM (you have been warned)!

- There is quite a few (read: a lot) of pages to catch up on already so you have quite a lot of binge material before you have to be sad waiting for updates like me (sobs quietly).

-The Puns. THE PUNS! (read: THE PUNS!!!)

-The witty dialogue with perfect sassy replies at all times and impromptu pun warfare are perfection (if only REAL life dialogue worked that way)

-The art is fabulous, all the facial expressions are precious and hilarious and so wonderful and make me LAUGH SO HARD! And as someone who attempts drawing-ish stuff when I’m not doing the 50000 OTHER things I get myself into, I know how hard those BLASTED BACKGROUNDS ARE. And I clap at the skill. Tea and cookies for you Zack Morrison, tea and cookies for you (unless you don’t like tea and cookies, then you can have coffee and crumpets I suppose).

- Max’s Dad is wonderful. Enough said. He is parenting goals…probably not really. (read: gives his kid candy for lunch and bought a convenience store to live in because it was his dream)

- Even though it is silly and comic (pun ABSOLUTELY intended), the characters are all deliciously complex, with backstories and private struggles and the whole gambit, and we get little morsels into their own secret thought minds, which is great fun and gets story points.

- It also has little serious parts that keep it from being nauseatingly light and gives it nice depth.

Do you read Paranatural? Will you give it a try? Do you read any other webcomics, I’d love some recommendations, I’m always looking for more to waste spend time on. Let me know down below.

Tuesday, July 5, 2016

THE SEARCH: Have you seen it? I can't seem to find it anywhere. Keep looking-

"Oh Dear Dream of Mine"
~By Elle J~

I have searched for you everywhere.
In empty bins of dreams,
Within ripped mattress seams.
I have made "WANTED" signs,
I've looked for you between unwritten lines,
Of the story of my unhappening life.

You don't know what I've done to find you.
I'm desperately in need of your light right now.
Tell me how,
How must I find you if all my other options depend on you too?
I don't know what to with myself.
Can't find that hope in anything else.

Once I find what I'm in search of, I won't ever let it go.
Once I find my hope to fly, I will just know.
When I find you, Oh Future of Mine, 
Oh Reason to Live, just watch what I do.
Yes, indeed, I will follow you through.

Just a little poem I came up with to inspire those in the same ball game as me- desperately searching for your calling- I hear ya loud and clear, and eventually, your future will too. ;P
~ELLE J~ <3<3<3

DO U SPEAK HUM-ISH??? (If you are reading this, I can almost guarantee that you do)

Today I shall bless you with the topic of none other than... language, YES THE MARVELOUS LANGUAGE that allows us to order our subway sandwich exactly the way we want it (no, I was not paid to advertise Subway "eat fresh") and find the right book in a library. However, the focus, my friend, is the big question. Do all humans come with a "human" language that cannot be altered by geographic location? Are we all connected by a simple thread from which we can never be budged? Why is it that if I went to a completely diverse country, I would still be able to ask for nearby restrooms and restaurants? There must be something there! Why is it that smiling is the universal sign for happiness?

Why does this baby look sad to us no matter where we are from?

And why does this baby look scared or that it has a lot more than merely "diaper" down there?

There must be something we all share? Don't you think? Tell me your opinions in the comments.


~ELLE~ <3<3<3
P.S. Sorry for not posting in ages. I will keep you guys posted when the wires in my brain randomly start working and produce thoughts worth sharing. ;D

Monday, July 4, 2016

Code Clips #1: Interactive Links with HTML

Hello, greetings, yes yes, shake hands, smiles all around. Good? Good.

Today I just want to share a little HTML tip that I find really helpful when blogging and commenting on other's blogs.

Ever see those people around the blogosphere who, instead of pasting the link of their blog in a comment as regular text, use whatever sorcery to actually make their blog name a link that you can clickity click? Today I shall teach you this sorcery.
Spoiler, its not actually sorcery, just a simple HTML tag that YOU can do! (Cue infomercial music)

Now many people already know about this (kudos to you, have a cookie) but I though I would put it out their for those who don't, so you can jump onto the fancy high tech link bandwagon because you know, we're in the 21st century now, we are the future!

Using this makes it easier for people to zip over to your blog through a comment you left, they may be interested but if they have to copy and paste a long rambling link (which is fairy difficult on mobile devices without a mouse) they might not visit and you could have lost a potential reader or friend.

When you write your comment, all you have to do is write this wherever you want your link to be.


When you use this its a good idea to use the preview button to see if it works before posting, it helps in avoiding the embarassing event that your link code doesn't work.

The "a" tag in HTML (Hyper Text Markup Language) is for a link and the "href" tells the code where in the internet the link should go to.

Make sense? No? Did you already know about this and am I just chittering to myself like a squirrely squirrel? Let me know in the comments below (hehe, it rhymes, that pleases me)

Saturday, July 2, 2016

Chose Your Choice

Yes, i'm still alive, kind of, more posts should be on the way soon so watch out for that.

Here's just a little snippet that I wrote, read it in all its strange choicy glory.

The man in front of me grins a salamander grin, the skin of his neck creating folds under a stubbly chin, as if the smile was weighing down his entire face. It was not a good smile. He pushes forward two boxes the size of matchboxes. 

In front of his left hand is a box of unadorned mahogany, just a dark box and nothing more. But it's simple design reeked of the quality of kings, it's seams sure and sealed, it's corners crisp and clean. It sits confident as a cat in its own worth and powers. Open me if you care, if you dare, it seems to say.

The box pushed forward by his left hand was of white opaque Quartz. It glittered with shifting dreams of forgotten promises and joyful days spend on joyful things. It's lid seems fit to pop open and spill it's enthusiasm to any who would listen, simply waiting for someone to peek at the hope and mystery inside.

Salamander says in a low sticky voice, "chose your own fate young thief. The choice is yours which box you chose, perhaps one is your poison and the other a blessing, perhaps they are both punishments for your crimes, the choice is yours" 

Your slide the smooth wood closer to you, its glossy sheen slides easily across the table. Its surface is warm to the touch, just hot enough to make you notice it but not hot enough to burn. You try to open what appears to be the lid, it won't budge. Instead a hidden drawer slides soundlessly out of the back. In it is a glittering crimson jewel. It's cold hard face grinning at you from its dark abode. The smooth jewel reflects your own shocked face.You look around, salamander is gone, the treasure is yours, you are free to go. Surely you made the right choice. The jewel winks at you with its bloody red face.

The box practically purrs as it slides into your hand. It's glittering quartz smiling at you, blinding you with its beaming bright grin. Your fingers graze the lock, it is cold, chills run down your hand and your spine. As soon as your hand touches it the lock leaps open, it sits contently, waiting expectantly for you to look inside. You peer in and see a black stone, a small black stone and that is all. You hold it in your hand, it is suddenly cold, so cold. The cold spreads down your fingers and up your arm, blistering your skin. You howl in pain as the cold burns you and the rock won't go, won't go. Then the rock drops from your hand and you flinch away from it as it clatters to the floor. The burning is gone, only the memory of the searing chill ghosts over your arm. You look around, salamander is gone, the box is gone, the rock is gone. You are free to go

Tut tut, naughty naughty little thief. Which do you chose?

Let me know in the comments what your choice was and how you feel about your fate. the choice is yours. >:)